To the Lassies

Doug asked me to give a traditional toast "to the lassies" for Burns Night. Below is the poem I wrote and delivered for the toast...
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"To the Lassies"
The lassies with us here tonight,
Are graced with many gifts,
We count ourselves as lucky friends
Although they give us fits.

For sure, they’re wise and beautiful,
Fair-skinned, with eyes that glisten,
But when they open mouths to speak
We resign ourselves to listen.

And on you go, ‘bout many things:
‘Bout Glee and Harry Potters,
‘Bout knitting, running, vampire men,
And even circus otters.

But that’s not all, as we well know,
For more we often hear,
Of Percy Jackson, word twist games
And even schnabeltiers.

You study eyes, you study books,
And other information;
You work to keep things nice and cold,
and work with animation.

You wrangle germs and viruses
With great dexterity;
And one of you does something strange:
‘sustainability.’

And though we tease, we clearly know,
Your worth to us as sisters;
Without you we would merely be
Sad and lonely misters.

And so, to end this silly rhyme,
I do what just seems right –
I borrow from Sir Burns himself
To celebrate this night:

"Auld Nature swears the lovely dears
Her noblest work she classes;
Her ‘prentice han’ she tried on man,
And then She made the lasses!"

Dear Beth, Christina, Chelsea, Jane,
To you, we raise our glasses.
And Megan, Sarah, Erica –
We toast you, all fair lasses.